Jump to Review: Tigers Nuts Rampage Whales
These projections are done in the spirit of fun. I love
all you guys.
Jami will undoubtedly have the best third baseman on the
worst Strat team of all time. (I am so jealous)
Offense: Jami has eight players, all offense and two
without cards. Lane, Gibbons and Berkman make for a solid
power hitting outfield, though the two younger guys need
to learn to take a walk to become good strat players.
Baldelli could help lead a Jaybird resurgence with a
healthy 2006. Rating 80
The infield has the most solid of bases in A Rod with an
exciting shortstop who does not walk in Reyes. Jami will
draft Cano to play second. Upton will provide some offense
in 2006 if the Devil Rays wake up while Kotchman will give
Jami a handful of games at first. Rating 60
Pitching - ????????? There isn't any. Rating 0. Once he
finishes his draft I would probably change this rating to
minus 20. Jami will absolutely have the worst strat
pitching staff of all time, maybe in any league in the
history of strat-o-matic. If Jami finishes with an ERA of
less than 9.00 he may win manager of the year.
Draft - Is this the most comical draft position of all
time? Jami has 5 18th's and 3 17th's among his 25 picks.
Surprisingly, Jami will still have 33 players. 5 of Jami's
25 picks are before the tenth round. Rating 0.
Prediction - I will go out on a limb and say Jami will
finish last. Jeff's all time lowest win record of 37 is in
The future - Jami has already traded his future 1st and
second, which will not help the rebuilding process. Jami
has a solid offensive nucleus for 2007, especially if the
two uncarded players come through. After Jami trades too
many of his 2008 picks he will probably win 70 games in
What I would do - 1. Trade A Rod for six firsts 2. Break
the Phanatic loss record 3. Have Tim play half my games.
This analysis is all in fun because I love myself.
Who among you put the pins in the voodoodoo doll to force
the Tigers to finally rebuild?
Outfield - Matsui is a good talent but like most Japanese
stars he tends to hit lefties too well to help in Strat.
Barry (Taz Killer)took the year off to get the steroids
out of his system and will come to spring training
weighing only 175 pounds. Mike Cameron may be a blithering
idiot after running into Beltran at 150 miles an hour. He
has a nice lefty killer card for 76 games and is going to
start in San Diego. Tigers need a lot of outfield games.
Infield - Yadier Molina is the worst offensive catcher the
Tigers have ever had. How weird is it to go from a +3 to a
minus 4 catcher arm? Konerko will hit some bombs at first.
Soriano will provide poor defense and power at second.
Cabrera, Mueller and McPherson provide mediocre offense to
the left side of the infield. The Tigers desperately need
McPherson to blossum in 2006. Rating 55
Pitching - 125 good baseball starts hampered by being 125
mediocre strat starts. None of my starters know how to get
a lefty stick out. They are all projected over 30 on the
left side. Bullpen? Not? Of course a rebuilding team will
draft no significant relief help. How many relief innings
can a rebuilding team get away with? 400. We shall see.
Draft - The Tigers have okay draft position in 2006. They
have 13 players and 19 picks, ten NL picks and 9 AL picks.
The Tigers seem poised to stock up on the second wave of
prospects in the NL, possibly a catcher, a shortstop and
an outfielder. Rating 70
Prediction - Ninth place with 60 wins
The future - The Tigers are looking at a two year
rebuilding process. They are plus 5 in the 2007 draft with
two firsts and 5 seconds. Can the Tigers resist taking the
Piazza, Schilling, and Benitez types to shorten the
rebuilding process. Will the Tigers be disciplined enough
to take only young players? These are the questions that
must be answered.
What they should do - 1. After buying multiple drinks for
folks trade Matsui for five firsts at the banquet. 2. Hope
for bad dice all year. 3. Change to a pitcher's park. 4.
Vote for bobblehead trophies for the next couple of years.
5. Send steroids to Bonds
Remember these predictions are based on my opinion and fun
and I really love you guys.
The rest of the American League can conceivably fight for
a playoff spot. The Nuts are no exception.
Infield - The Nuts pitcher's park encourages one to have a
strong armed catcher. While the bat is mediocre the arm of
Molina fits the bill. Texiera is a major star at first.
The drafting of Ellis will give Charlie a top 5 second
baseman. Shortstop is well covered with the consistent
Guillen and young Barmes. Randa is at least average at
third. Rating 88
Outfield - I can't get real excited about the Nuts
outfield but it might be my own personal predjudice.
Podsednik and DeJesus are ideal players for the pitcher's
park. Neither has power that is wasted. Both have great
speed and credible defense. Guillen did well against
righties. Rivera I guess is still a prospect, though he is
one of the worst players kept on a fifteen man roster.
Pitching - The Nuts have three decent starters with
Buerhle, Mulder and Bonderman but with two lefties in a
draft full of lefty killers they are average at best. The
Nuts do have a strong bullpen nucleus with Nathan and
Cotts and a solid meat man in Mateo. Rating 75
Draft - The Nut's draft position is mediocre. After a
strong first pick for Ellis, Charlie is missing his
second. The Nuts have eight picks in the first nine
rounds. Rating 70.
Prediction - Eighth with 75 wins.
The Future - Charlie has all his future picks.
What I would do - 1. Burn the park down 2. Draft young
guys 3. Trade my bullpen for futures to the highest bidder
4. Take Weeks instead of Ellis and/or get an extra first
from Dave to move up one pick. 5. Fight Richard for the
second pick in the 2007 draft. 6. Trade the lefty starters
to the National League.
Remember I love you guys!
The Rampage could easily make a run at the playoffs if he
wants to draft cards but I smell Mike will board the
prospect train and hope his candidates do not derail (choo
Outfield - Thank goodness that do not build Manny's mouth
into the Strat cards but he is still a strat card stud.
Dye is average with decent power and Winn borrowed
steroids from Barry once he arrived in San Fran to give
him a nice card on the right side. Defensively this group
is just shy of mediocre. Rating 68
Infield - A Rod is a great whoooops. Sorry! Koskie at
third - limited in games and talent. Thome - over the hill
and limited. Kennedy - old decent and limited. (Detecting
a theme?) Lopez is good on the right side but his fielding
is limited. Finally, as a catcher Lopez makes a bad DH.
Yuck! Time to rebuild for sure. Rating 58
Pitching - Morris, Lackey, Towers and Arroyo. TYhe best
thing to say is they are not smelly. I would not say they
smell good either. Nevertheless, they are better than what
is available in the draft. Bullpen - One mediocre closer
type. Rating 70
Jami's Draft - Er, I mean Mike's draft. Thanks to Jami one
trade translate to powerful draft position. Four firsts
will net some excellent prospects. Hopefully, two of the
four will pan out. Overall, Mike is even with 13 players
and 20 picks. Rating 95
Prediction 81 wins - 14 and 2 against Jami and Richard
The future - Mike has two extra firsts for 2007 including
the first pick in the draft. Prospecting is a tough
business. Too often even the least risky looking of
prospects turns into fools gold in the streams of strat.
What I would do - 1. Pull the trigger on deals 2. Make
some controversial buddy deals with your AL friends 3.
Quit being anchor and striking out in the tenth when your
team leads by 100 pins (wrong sport sorry) 4. Three firsts
for Matsui 5. Trade Javy quick
Remember about the love.
The Whales can compete but they need a little drafting
luck for the best chance of success.
Infield - Posada is sliding a little but is still better
than the majority of catchers. Johnson is an on-base
machine with limited pop while Tony Clark will be a
beautiful, limited one year wonder. Jeter is always one of
the better shortstop options while Blaylock will
definitely need a platoon mate at third. Rating 87
Outfield - Abreu is a 1 gold glover, I mean 3 and he
provides great on-base with okay pop. Mench provides Texas
power (the new Coors) but little on base. Reed is a young
work in progress and why did Randy pick up Huff anyway?
Pitching - Randy will be a monster if he makes the
playoffs with Roger's swan song and Halladay (who took a
half year holiday). Colon is better than most third
starters to be sure. Now what? Lowe is definitely hittable
and even the Tigers would like to swing the bat against
Cabrera. Finally, Randy has zero bullpen (I refuse to
count Reitsma as an asset). Where does this leave the
Whales? On life support with the miracle cure within
reach. Randy really needs a closer. Turnbow fits the bill.
Will Randy be allowed to draft Turnbow or will he have to
settle for Crain and his zero closer rating? He also needs
quality innings. Good luck getting them in this draft.
Rating 65, 85 if he gets Turnbow, 75 if he gets Crain
The draft - Randy has decent draft position. The 16th pick
in the National League would net a decent to good bullpen
guy while the Whales 2nd could net a card that might save
him. There are several surprising relievers available with
a lot of innings. Randy has adequate picks to satisfy the
majority of his needs. Rating 80
Prediction sixth with 83 wins
The Future - The Whales are missing their future 4th and
have an extra 15th.
What I would do - 1. Offer Dave a low ball offer to move
up and get the reliever you want. 2. Erase some of the on-
base numbers on Reitsma's card 3. Forget to use Cabrera in
your rotation. 4. Use Tony Clark for 162 games.
5.Establish a trade committee. 6. Propose that we outlaw
strat games on the west end 7. Never travel 8. Buy the FOP
and charge admission. 9. Reverse the Barry Bonds trade,
offering the same 7 for 1 deal. 10. Pay a hitman to end
Richard's bad humor for good.